My {Not So} Strange Addiction

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My name is Gabriella Drago, and I am addicted to my guide dog.
Last weekend,  I had to leave Freesia behind. I went to a wedding and left her with my mom. The whole time I felt like a part of me was missing. I know that there will occasionally be times when I will have to leave Freesia alone, but it’s difficult for me to think about. She has become a part of me. When we work together, she is my eyes. When she is in harness, but not working to guide me, she is still my eyes for when I need them. I’ve only been with her for 6 weeks, yet now, being without her makes me feel open, alone, incomplete. It sounds crazy. After a while, it started to feel more normal being without her, the way my life used to be, but it didn’t feel quite right.
Almost equally as hard, is when, on occasion, my friends will “subtly” express their discontent with my bringing Freesia with us. A small part of me understands where they are coming from. Bringing a dog can be a lot of work, almost like having a baby. Never is the shedding a problem, just the fact that Freesia requires a portion of my attention. I think there is also an unspoken level of jealousy. Where once I relied solely on my friends for guidance, I now, more often than not, rely on Freesia. Despite this understanding, a larger part of me is frustrated and upset. My dog is a part of me; we are a package deal. She is my security, my eyes, my independence. However, I will admit that it is not reasonable to expect my friends to understand what they cannot experience. Understanding will come for them eventually. If you are one who does not understand this connection, that is completely okay. Imagine that someone has asked you to go out for a day with a blindfold on, how comfortable would you feel? Instead of relying on yourself to see where you are going, you would have to rely on a variety of people to guide you and help you. Although Freesia and I are separate, we are a team; and unlike the constant changing of people that I once had to rely on, she, alone,  is my constant, and I hope that I am hers.

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4 thoughts on “My {Not So} Strange Addiction

  1. I get the jealousy thing. I think I was! But after spending the afternoon with you and Freesia I realize how amazing the two of you are going to be. As usual, you will make her happy and more complete – like you do to the rest of us.

    Like

  2. Hi Gabriella, I am taking Blogging 101 and our assignment for today is to follow and leave comments on four new blogs. I loved reading about you and Freesia! We have raised four guide dog puppies and had a wonderful CC for almost 15 years. I have visited San Rafael many times. Really looking forward to following your blog!

    Liked by 1 person

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